How to Know When Enough Is Enough: A Practical Guide for High-Achievers.
The Spiral of "More"
Have you ever thought, “If I can do it, I should do it” or “This isn’t enough—I could always do more”?
In a world where performance is celebrated as the ultimate virtue, it’s easy to confuse growth with pressure, self-improvement with over-adaptation. What’s marketed as strength—giving it your all—can quickly become a golden cage.
A Story to Reflect On
A few years ago, I worked with Sarah (name changed), a high performer with an impressive career. From the outside, she had it all: success, drive, and a reputation for being reliable. But beneath the surface, she was running on fumes.
During one session, she realized that her relentless drive stemmed from her late father’s words: “If you can handle it, you should.” I asked her, “If your father could see you now, what would he say?”
With tears in her eyes, she replied, “He’d say, ‘Stop. This is too much—you’ll burn out like I did.’”
This moment changed everything for Sarah. She started to see how her incredible qualities—dedication, discipline, and drive—were also her Achilles’ heel. She wasn’t thriving; she was surviving. And something had to change.
How to Tell When Enough Is Enough
The problem with "always doing more" is that it builds up quietly, like a stack of “just one more thing” that eventually topples over. Here are some common red flags that signal it’s time to pause:
Emotional exhaustion: You’re snapping at trivial things or feeling overwhelmed by the smallest tasks.
Loss of focus: You can't concentrate, and even small tasks feel monumental.
Sleep problems: Falling asleep or staying asleep becomes a challenge.
Physical symptoms: Chronic stress shows up as headaches, neck tension, or digestive issues.
Disengagement: Things you once enjoyed now feel uninspiring.
What Keeps Us Stuck
Why is it so hard to stop the spiral? Here are three sneaky thought traps:
“If I don’t do it, no one will.”
This belief creates a false sense of control but locks you into the role of savior.
“I don’t want to let anyone down.”
Seeking validation through performance perpetuates a cycle of toxic perfectionism.
“It’s just a busy season—it’ll pass.”
This mindset keeps us from challenging unsustainable habits.
Taking Action, One Step at a Time
Change doesn’t require a complete overhaul—it starts with micro-decisions.
Learn to say no. Start small: decline one non-essential task.
Pause deliberately. Try this breathwork practice: inhale deeply for 4 seconds, hold for 4 seconds, exhale for 6 seconds. Repeat five times.
Accept the process. Progress is made in the small, daily steps. Celebrate them.
Moving Forward
As I return to work after maternity leave, I’m reflecting on the balance between ambition and well-being. I’ve seen firsthand how powerful small changes can be.
If this resonates with you, let’s connect. I’m currently open to new clients who are ready to navigate their own "too much."
If you’d like more of this kind of content, comment below and share your thoughts. Let’s keep the conversation going.
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